Overcoming Moves: Friendships

I’ve always told my kids that the best thing about moving so many times is all of the amazing people we meet who become our friends. If we had stayed put in one place, we never would have met these people and what a loss that would be!

Moving is never easy and I always go through a mourning period at my new location. I mourn my former life…the job, the friends, the home, the community, our family routine, etc…what my life was like.

It’s exciting and scary all at the same time when establishing myself and our family in a new place.  How long will it take to meet people and make friends? Who will we meet? How will we get involved in the community? Will I work, if so, where?

When I think back to moving to Gig Harbor,  honestly the first four months weren’t easy. (I tend to forget because we love Gig Harbor so much). We left Albany after living there for over 7 years and it really was where my kids spent their elementary school years. I left a job that I absolutely loved (story of my life) and an amazing core group of friends, many whom I also considered my spiritual mentors. I grew so much in the Lord when I lived in Albany.

I chose not to work for awhile in Gig Harbor and so after putting the  house in order, painting the rooms, and decorating how I wanted, I was lonely. It didn’t help that at the same time, my then 8th grade son did a 180. He had always been a loving, affectionate momma’s boy who talked to me about everything. Well he grew up, acted as though he didn’t need me anymore, and truth be told detested me. Needless to say it broke my heart. Not only was I mourning my previous life, but I was mourning the loss of my little boy.

I remember evenings crying in my husband’s arms missing my old life and wondering if I’d ever establish a new life just as wonderful here. Sure enough, it didn’t take long for all of us to meet people and make friends. When it was time again  for us to move, I did not want to leave the friendships that I’d established in just three short years; It hurts your heart to say goodbye. And so my cycle began again with a 7th move with Brian.

I guess the toughest part about living here in North Carolina is that it has been THE most difficult place to meet people and make friends. My kids and I don’t usually have too much trouble with that and we usually start making friends within the first few months. Well this has been the exception to the rule.  It’s a beautiful place but I believe that the people make the place. For me and my family, it has been lacking…It’s a place where we don’t feel like we exist.

But God is good…He rekindled our friendship with Carol (who worked with Brian when we lived in Albany), and I would not have survived without our lunch dates and her assistance in getting settled here.

About 8 months ago I met an amazing lady here in New Bern and she instantly “saw” me and my family in a place where we feel invisible. One day she invited this lonely me to lunch. Immediately she became a heart friend and I felt like I had known her forever! This was a divine appointment from above! I’m not sure I would have survived the past few months without her friendship. God knew that more than ever during this time I needed a heart friend and Kim is this to me. In fact, I am not looking forward to saying goodbye to her in 60 days.

There is something to be said about being surrounded by people to enjoy life with…loneliness is no way to live. I am grateful to the Lord above for all of the incredible people I call friends that I have in my life. I am so blessed and appreciative because it makes my life that much more fulfilling.